Baseball Crank
Covering the Front and Back Pages of the Newspaper
February 25, 2004

I wrote this one up two three years ago, when my friends and I were turning 30. Obviously, not all of these apply to me ;) and #7 is rather dated now. But I thought I'd share:


1. You refer to college students as "kids."
2. You remember all the things that happened "twenty years ago this day."
3. You're the boss.
4. Athletes your age have started retiring.
5. They don't write 'em like that anymore.
6. You realize your children won't remember the 20th century.
7. You watched the Super Bowl halftime show and realized you were listening to Aerosmith when Britney Spears was in diapers.
8. Your mortgage is bigger than your student loans.
9. The first girl you kissed had a crush on Doug Flutie at the time.
10. You stop and listen when the TV news runs a story on Viagara.
11. You now have more hair on your arms than on your head.
12. You think they should do something about fake IDs.
13. "Relaxed fit" pants.
14. You remember when we wanted to party like it's 1999.
15. You still get excited at hearing "Do you believe in miracles?"
16. There used to be lots of things you didn't do because you had no money; now there are lots of things you don't do because you have no time.
17. You pay someone to mow your lawn.
18. You look at the stock tables before the box scores.
19. You spend a lot of time on the Internet reading things written by people younger than you are.
20. You can't believe Pete Rose is turning sixty.
21. You have fond memories . . . of reunions.
22. You don't go to that bar anymore, you can't even hear yourself think.
23. You just don't get Eminem.
24. You remember when people said "space age" the way they now say "internet age."
25. You've seen all four "Star Wars" films in the theater - the first time around.
26. In most photos of your childhood, you are wearing plaid pants.
27. Your first new car died.
28. Your year starts in January, not September.
29. You actually bothered to vote this time.
30. You know . . . whatsisname . . .

UPDATE: Yeah, when I wrote this I forgot how many years ago it was. Bad sign.

Posted by Baseball Crank at 11:44 PM | Blog 2002-05 | Comments (1) | TrackBack (0)

Iíve still got a little time (and am still broke, single and spending time on a campus).

In your defense, I donít think you will ever be someone who looks at stock tables before the box scores.

Posted by: The Mad Hibernian at February 26, 2004 10:14 AM
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